Through all those early months when I was desperately trying to figure out what each cry meant, I wished for the day she would learn to talk, when we could communicate with more than screams and tears (on both sides).
As we creep ever close to Izzy’s second birthday my wish is coming true. Every day she has new words she’s trying out and putting to use to make herself understood and to make sense of the world around her.
It’s everything I hoped for and more.
Everything I hoped for…
When they can ask for what they want it’s (sometimes) so quick and easy to solve the issue. There’s less crying (sometimes). It’s amazing watching their little brains work. The level of constant learning is awe inspiring. Being able to share their joy when they get something right or get the reaction they were hoping for is so fun. And when they learn to ask for a hug it’s enough to leave your heart in a puddle on the floor.
When they can ask for what they want and you either can’t or wont give it to them it is officially the End of the World (and they are so much harder to distract once they are set on something now!) Doing anything takes twice to four times as long because they need to name everything and they have opinions on which socks to wear, what colour of plate to serve up dinner on, which teddies need to be in the bed, the list goes on but you get the idea. All of that I felt ready for, I’d seen it in the frustrated faces of moms with toddlers before. But what I wasn’t ready for is just how heart breaking it is the first time they can tell you how sick they are. She was running a fever a few nights ago and when I responded to her cries in the night, her sad little voice explaining “I hot, I cold” was nearly more than I could stand.
There’s so much to look forward to – conversations to be had, “I love you”s to be earnestly whispered, moments of pride and excitement to be celebrated together.
But I know there will be hard times too. Times when I can’t bear to hear what she is telling me – whether it be something she has chosen to do (like move to the other side of the world – sorry mom!) or something that has happened to hurt her. I only hope I can be strong enough to really listen and be the support she needs.